TDM #2 - Down in the Underground [REPRINT]

[pumpkinhollow]

Pumpkin Hollow Gazette Issue #3 [REPRINT]

[Moderator Notes]

Since our TDMs go out bi-monthly, this is a test run of reposting the TDM at the beginning of "off-months" in order to optimize visibility for toplevels in the second month of a TDM's lifespan. If this turns out to actually be helpful, then brand-new TDMs will be labelled "FIRST EDITION" and reruns will be labeled "REPRINT" going forward! If not, we'll just go back to posting bi-monthly. Let's give this the ol' college try and make sure to look out for new toplevels so that we can figure out how helpful it is!

Pumpkin Hollow Gazette

8/5/23 | TDM #2: "Down in the Underground"
Content Warnings: [Article 2] claustrophobia, caves, drowned corpse
[Article 4] Various violence by monster

We're glad you're here!

WELCOME TO PUMPKIN HOLLOW!

By Yorick Aberdeen

JACK'S MARINA - Reports from the Pumpkin Hollow Port Authority indicate that arrivals by otherworldly newcomers to Marrow Isle are continuing at a steady rate. The first batch of new arrivals, which had been the very first travelers to Pumpkin Hollow in at least five years’ time, began in early June of this year and have already proven to be an incredible boon to both our economy and our overall quality of life. We now have a new farm on the island for the first time in years, as well as clever new members of the constabulary, a few helpful craftspeople, and even our own brand new local musical act. Not only that, but the prestigious Ms. Dahlia Leeds has taken a personal assistant, which this reporter is pleased to announce has gotten him out of a number of mundane tasks. (No offense is meant to Ms. Leeds, of course--- the Pumpkin Hollow Gazette certainly harbors no ill will toward its most consistent donor!)

According to interviews with a number of these newcomers, they appear to all come from realms far beyond our own, to the point where they have homelands with unfamiliar names and have never heard of the Emerald Isles at all. Those willing to share more details report that they each met with a strange woman in a bland-looking office building who offered them a chance at a new life, then found themselves on the ferry here. None of them seem to know anything further, as far as the Pumpkin Hollow Gazette is aware. Curious circumstances indeed.

That said, we are beyond pleased to welcome even more new neighbors to our fair town. Any newcomers should feel welcome to come to Town Hall if they are in any need of assistance. Mayor Poe and any member of Town Council would all be more than happy to lend a hand.

Additionally, the Temple of Sacred Roots will be holding a small gathering on temple grounds to welcome any wayward souls who could use a bit of help adjusting. Reverend Degas Clayton would also like to remind everyone that he is always available to offer guidance after any of his Sunday sermons unless otherwise stated. He has expressed an interest in personally welcoming as many new residents as he is able.

Hopefully things will continue to look up for Pumpkin Hollow as more arrivals land upon our docks. This will be of particular importance as we draw ever closer to Autumn. October in particular promises to be an especially difficult time, as usual. The Pumpkin Hollow Gazette will report further on our paranormal forecast as the season of spirits draws near. We hope to keep local casualties to a minimum this year after last year’s record high.

In any case, best of luck to our new residents, and welcome again!

NOTORIOUS 'RIVER WALKER' SPOTTED AFTER LONG ABSENCE; EXTREME CAUTION ADVISED

By Yorick Aberdeen

The Paring River Bridge in Lockwood Forest.

LOCKWOOD FOREST (Paring River) - Woodland travelers beware! And not just for all of the usual reasons, either. This past weekend, local shepherd Joseph Peterson reported to the local constabulary that he had an encounter with a creature that had been presumed to have moved on from our fair isle. Peterson, 37, allegedly came across the beast colloquially known as the “River Walker” while crossing the Paring River bridge near the entrance of Lockwood Forest, where he was grabbed and knocked out. Once he regained consciousness, Peterson then reported being lost in an underground cave system whilst being pursued by the monster for an unknown amount of time estimated between six and twelve hours.

The River Walker, a spider-like creature with the face of a human corpse, is so named because it appears to exclusively use the Paring River as its hunting ground. The creature is apparently completely unique to Marrow Isle, as the Pumpkin Hollow Historical Society was unable to uncover folklore or recorded sightings of anything matching the River Walker’s description in any of the texts they have access to. However, through collecting data from resurrected residents who were its victims, the Town Hall Safety Board was able to glean information about this menace that should help citizens avoid yet another timely demise.

Firstly, all residents traveling in the Lockwood Forest should steer clear of the Paring River if possible. While it is true that the Paring River cuts directly through the forest near the entrance and arcs through the majority of the woodlands, and also that the main path through the woods which goes over the Paring River bridge is the only way through to Crane’s RIdge or any of the hunting areas, the river should still be avoided whenever residents are able. This will minimize potential contact.

Secondly, be aware of your surroundings when near the river. Data indicates that the creature will make a soft chittering sound before reaching up to grab a victim. Many prior victims also report the surrounding area seeming “too still” when the creature was in the area. If you experience any of these phenomena, it would be wise to run--- though most reports suggest that outrunning the River Walker aboveground is impossible. But still, it is important to do your best.

And lastly, should you be taken below ground with this monstrous creature, it will transport you to tight underground caves where you will be forced to crawl, squeeze, and climb for your life. All the while it will follow you, taunting and toying with you. Utilize these long, grueling hours to your advantage! Studies have shown that the River Walker struggles to attack groups of two or more effectively, so while you are being tortured, search for a traveling companion!

If you do encounter the River Walker, please report the sighting to the Town Council or the Historical Society regardless of whether or not you die. Those killed by the River Walker are encouraged to stop by the Oak & Iron for a copy of the Safety Board’s Advice Pamphlet for the Recently Deceased after resurrecting. And remember, quitters are tastier prey, so don’t give in to despair! Even if you are caught and killed, you can at least say you persisted out of spite.

BLUE ISLAND CRAB HATCHING SEASON BEGINS AS SUMMER HEAT PERSISTS

By Yorick Aberdeen

A little sketch by yours truly.

TAWNY BEACH - If you’re out on the beach enjoying the last month of warm sea water, be mindful where you step! Earlier this spring, the local Blue Island Crab population had their mating season. Males of the species came up on the shore with clusters of tiny but durable eggs bundled up in their claws and buried them in the sand, and they’ve been warmed by the summer sun all season. As we enter the last month of summer the new crabs are finally ready to emerge from their birthplaces and begin their lives.

It is worth noting, however, that newborn Blue Island Crabs tend not to go directly back to the sea. In fact, it is common for them to spend the first few weeks of their lives searching for food and nesting materials such as seashells, driftwood, broken pottery, or small pieces of metal roughly the size of the average piece of valuable jewelry. They are also very adept climbers and are capable of scaling stairs and countertops with relative ease. Additionally, they seem to be able to communicate well with others of their species and are capable of collaborating. Many townsfolk have even gone so far as to describe their behavior as “scheming.” Blue Island Crabs are also notorious for not being very picky about what they eat. All this is to say, expect to have your food, personal items, and practically anything that is not tied down stolen by small blue crabs.

An unfortunate side effect of the hex has been that the beloved and highly anticipated Cucumber Festival, which normally takes place in early June, had to be canceled due to a lack of cucumbers. This has earned the ire of a great many residents who have cited the festival as “their last source of a modicum of joy on this goddess-forsaken island”, among other more colorful statements.

But there is good news! Hatching season and the subsequent early life of the crabs, all told, will not last more than a few weeks before the crabs mature enough to return to the sea with the rest of their kind. And of course those lucky enough to catch some will report that they make for a fine meal. There is no finer party dish than a Blue Island crab boil!

INCREASED PINE DEVIL SIGHTINGS SPELL BAD NEWS FOR LOCAL PEDESTRIANS

By Yorick Aberdeen

A painting of the Pine Devil provided by Mayor Poe

ISLAND-WIDE - In more concerning news, reports have been coming in from all over the island that there have been an uptick in sightings of the Pumpkin Hollow Howler. Otherwise known as the Pine Devil, this extremely dangerous man-eating beast has been a staple of Marrow Isle’s rotating cast of horrors for at least the past 15 years. Much like the aforementioned River Walker, the Pine Devil has a tendency to come and go and sightings fluctuate with some regularity. It seems that as we draw closer to prime haunting season we will be faced with increased appearances from the island’s least-favorite celebrity.

Here’s what we know:

The Howler’s primary motivation is to eat and he prefers larger prey. This includes pigs, cattle, deer, and humans. He has no known den and is apparently nomadic. No one has ever been able to locate the Pumpkin Hollow Howler when he is not actively hunting. At full height, he stands a whopping eight feet tall on unguligrade legs. He has clawed hands and large fangs which are its primary method of attacking and is capable of flight, and his eyes glow blue in the dark. He is a strong, fast creature who has no qualms about coming into town if necessary. Surviving encounters with the beast is notably rare.

If you have any encounters with the Pumpkin Hollow Howler, report to Town Hall or the constable’s station at your earliest convenience to make an incident report. The constabulary is taking reports 24 hours a day, so please make your report either immediately after the incident or upon resurrection. May your lanterns stay lit, and be safe out there!

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Captured by the River Walker? Click here…

Perhaps you didn’t read the paper. Perhaps you didn’t take the warnings seriously. Or maybe you simply had no other choice. Whatever the case may be, the Paring River Bridge lies before you, and the world around you is unnaturally still. The sounds of chirping birds, burrowing mammals, and chittering insects have all died and left the air uncannily silent.



You attempt to hurry across, hoping to make it before anything unsavory catches your scent. But the moment you place your foot upon the stone pavers of the bridge, it is already too late. Behind you, you can hear the scuttling of much too large insectoid legs and a soft rattling sound, almost like the sound of a woodpecker drilling into a tree but somehow… wetter.



Instinctively, you turn to look behind you. A bulbous, lumpy abdomen drags the ground, and from it extends a set of eight black legs, chunky and irregular, as if they were wooden stakes hewn into rough points with a careless knife. Long, spindly fingers extend from thin arms on either side of an emaciated torso covered in shiny black insect carapace. And on top, the face of a human woman who looked as though she’d been drowned, bloated and rotting. White eyes, matted brown hair, and a wicked smile framed by patchy blue lips.



You black out before you even have the chance to scream.



When you awaken, your head is pounding as if you’ve just woken from a bender. You are on a dirty, irregular stone floor. The beginnings of stalagmites jab into your back. In the distance, you can hear dripping water and the shifting of something moving. It is dark, but light enough to see by, allowing you to see plainly that the ceiling above you is significantly too low for you to stand.



Then, you hear a laugh, hoarse and cruel. “Rise and shine, little morsel. Oh, how I do love to play with my food…”



That’s your cue to get moving.



For the next several long, grueling hours, you crawl your way through this tight and unrelenting fortress of stone on hands and knees as rocks cut into your hands. In caves that are tall enough to stand, you have to walk sideways to proceed or even hold your breath in order to make it, and all the tunnels look more or less the same. The River Walker’s raspy voice echoes off the walls, making its location imperceptible… but it’s close.



You need to find a traveling companion. And soon.

Interested in encountering the Pine Devil? Click here...

The Pine Devil is a mod-run NPC and we can only handle a certain number of encounters at once. For this TDM we will be favoring new characters on a first-come, first-served basis. However, you may still handwave or summarize the encounter by rolling a D20 with 15+ to survive and 18+ to walk away unscathed, and write out the aftermath. You do not need a mod’s permission to do this!


You also do not need to fill out a Death Certificate if you're not fully apped in, but can if you want to. Your character will resurrect as normal either way!

Comments

Cecil Gershwin Palmer | Welcome to Night Vale

[lasthumanvoice]

A Word from Our Sponsor [Arrival]
There is a man. He is not short, but nor is he tall. His face has two eyes and seems animated, expressive, lively. He seems very much to be alive. This is Cecil Palmer, the Voice of Night Vale.

He is not within Night Vale now. No, he has arrived in Pumpkin Hollow in the same manner as so many others, sent by a goddess with very little instruction and the same amount of reassurance. But he is, inevitably, here. As the city unfolds before him, there's a reflexive gesture, a reaching for a notepad that is not there. He does not have paper; even if writing utensils are not forbidden here, he is not carrying one. He will need to rely on the flimsy material that is his own memory, for the moment.

But first, he needs to encounter something worth remembering. This is it, the moment he's entering town...and walking into the road without looking for carriages or people headed somewhere, like a complete dipshit.

Whoops!


Children's Fun Fact Science Corner [Crabs]
Crabs! What are they? Cecil doesn't know, that's a matter for Scientists, like Carlos, but he knows this much: there are sure a lot of them here right now. Scuttling, skittering and overall scuppering everyone's pleasant days.

He is currently chasing after one that has a pen in its claws. He is shouting the best threats he can think of, for a crab, at it.

"Crab alfredo tortellini! Crabcakes with homemade remoulade! Fried softshell crab po'boys with hush puppies! Crab pasta salad!" All recipes he learned from Earl Harlan, of course. At least one of which may contain crab.


A Public Service Announcement [Wildcard]
I can be found at darkersolstice on plurk and discord.

Science Corner

[thelatechrisfreeman]

Not again. They're trapped in a spiral. Is it up or down?

Chris picks up a rock from the sand, and throws it at the pen-toting crab. Even if the rock doesn't land exactly on the crab, it makes the little creature startle and change its direction -- back toward Cecil, hopefully.

They move slower than before, but try to get around to corner the crab so that the pen doesn't end up in the sea.

[lasthumanvoice]

"There you are, you miserable many-legged monstrosity!" He is, very clearly, talking to the crab and not Chris. Chris, as far as Cecil can tell, only has two legs, which is the number City Council has approved for human beings.

There is a desperate lunge, a dive...and a miss. The crab continues its scurry.

[thelatechrisfreeman]

There is a moment where Chris glances to each side, as if checking to make sure he hasn't sprouted extra legs. (poor regina, poor kate)

"Goodness sake!" Chris huffs out in disappointment, when the crab scuttles free. They keep chasing after the crab, focus narrowing down to the little creature.

It means they don't notice the seashell shards littering this section of the beach, despite their bare feet. Little drops of blood trail behind them -- then, a lunge for the crustacean.

"Ha!" Chris huffs, crab in hand as zie tumbles to the sand. (Said crab holds the pen in one pincer and tries to attack Chris with the other.) Perhaps a blood sacrifice was needed. To Cecil, zie says, "Give something else to hold onto, then get your pen!"

[[ OOC: Thank you, sparkly green D20, for the 18...]]

[lasthumanvoice]

"Something else, something else, something else..."

He pulls a button from his shirt, and nabs the pen with all the swiftness of a coming deadline. "There! Take this instead, you chitinous thief!"

[thelatechrisfreeman]

The little crab clamps down on the button, and doesn't fight nearly so much to hold onto the pen.

Once sure that Cecil has hold of his pen, Chris tosses the blue crab a short distance away. They sigh, "I really ought to go back into town. This is the second time I had to chase crabs today."

Then they look over to Cecil, and smile slightly. "Oh well. At least your pen didn't join all of Town Hall's pens in the sea."

[lasthumanvoice]

"Yet. It hasn't joined town hall's pens yet. Give it time. Pens have a strange magnetism for one another."

Cecil smiles brightly, and finally turns to look at Chris, and then to look at Chris, curiosity brightening his eye-colored eyes.

Word from Our Sponsor

[skeletonkeay]

Gerard is no Archivist, but his connection to the Eye gives him enough insight to see this walking mess coming down the street in newcomer's linens, looking at his map and absolutely nothing else, reeking of every Fear and looking comically normal despite this.

He is also about to get hit by a carriage.

With a sigh, Gerry grabs him by the back of the shirt and yanks him out of the way, shouting an apology to the disgruntled driver on Cecil's behalf.

"Just because the streets aren't busy doesn't mean it's a good idea to stand in 'em, y'know," he chides. "Where you headed?"

[lasthumanvoice]

Scruffed like a kitten, Cecil doesn't wriggle like one (though the temptation is certainly there).

"I was told there would be a room? At the Oak and Iron tavern? I mean, there are probably several rooms, that's how taverns tend to work, but one where I would be allowed to sleep."

[skeletonkeay]

Gerard barks out an odd laugh, amused by Cecil's strange phrasing. Odd guy. "Yeah, man, that's where you stay when you get here," he says. "Need some help finding the place?"

[lasthumanvoice]

"Yes! Probably. Are you offering to help me with finding the place?"

How exciting, a stranger who knows where he's going. Cecil would follow him just about anywhere.

[skeletonkeay]

Gerard chuckled. "Yeah, man, I know the way. I'll show you. Just stay out of the street, willya?"

He waves Cecil along and makes his way to the tavern, casting an odd look at him. He wants to ask what the fuck is going on with this guy, but etiquette says introductions come first. "I'm Gerry, by the way."

[lasthumanvoice]

"I'm Cecil. It's nice to meet you...I think. I mean that I'm hopeful meeting you will be nice, but you're under no obligation, of course."

He's trying, Gerry. He's trying. And following, of course.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzG5JFreTWQ | Wildcard | Oak & Iron

[restingslasherface]

Jean's here for morning coffee. Jean is always here for morning coffee. Jean will legitimately skip meals in favor of morning coffee, and has. At first the new face goes a little unnoticed, and then the double take. More coffee. The triple take. Finish this cup, pour a new one -

- Jean calls their shot and gets up with the coffee pot and their cup before walking over. "Excuse me, are you -" 'a new hire' dies on their lips, shushed by Zelda's voice in Jean's head. "- fresh off the ferry?"

[lasthumanvoice]

"I am." Cecil nods, then looks up at Jean and...oh, that's a concerning smile. That is a smile that he flinches from, just a little. He can't help but wonder if the Smiling God and Strexcorp have dominion here, if he's now in greater danger than he realized.

But. That won't stop him from being friendly, yet.

[restingslasherface]

"There's still some of the coffee left if you want it!" Jean raises the pot before setting it down on the table. They do not move to sit yet. "I'm Agent Jean, also off the ferry a few months ago. Did you have time for an interview? No pressure! Nothing personal! I try to get people's skill sets written down for organizational purposes!"

[lasthumanvoice]

"Agent Jean? For what agency?" That's how agents work, right? Cecil is hesitant, also standing beside the table rather than sitting. He's taking cues from those around him, and Jean...

...Jean is not giving very useful cues.

[restingslasherface]

"...Well formerly of L-Corp but honestly, hahaha, ha, it's just, the only gender-neutral honorific that I know in this language, so."

Awkward expression has loaded.

1/3

[lasthumanvoice]

"Oh." The first time is surprise, untempered by any other emotion.

[lasthumanvoice]

"Oh." The second, thoughtful. Considering. Proper response still loading.

A Word from Our Sponsor

[amnotaweasel]

Unfortunately for both Cecil and Misao, there was in fact a girl where he was trying to walk. She is very short, so maybe Cecil can be forgiven for not noticing her, but that is probably not a justification Cecil wants to use if he wants her to like him.

And it's not like she wasn't staring, mystified, at her surroundings.

"H-Hey! I'm sorry, was I somehow in your way?" Someone not from Kyoto might think she is being sincere. Someone from Kyoto (or decently good at detecting indigation) would interpret this in the same tone as, 'I'm sorry, did the start of my sentence cut yours off?'

[lasthumanvoice]

"It is exceedingly difficult for two humans to exist in the same space at the same time."

There's a mild note of apology that could easily be missed behind the weird-as-fuck choice of words.

[amnotaweasel]

That is a weird way to apologize, but at this point, she's used to weird. Her friend group has turned being as bizarre as possible into an art form, and just plain weird don't win show at the county fair, as the saying goes.

"Sure," she says. "I guess we both could have looked where we were going." She offers a half-bow as part of her apology, then turns her attention to their actual surroundings. "Have you ever seen a place like this before?"

She hasn't.

[lasthumanvoice]

"That depends wholly on what you mean by 'like this'. If you mean a collection of buildings surrounded by streets, filled with people? Yes, yes I have. If you mean an island community where people who are dead are brought? No, I have not. If you mean it in the broadest sense, of perceiving a location with my eyes? Yes, yes I have."

He continues to perceive it now.

"It...might be a good place. Maybe."

[amnotaweasel]

Wow, he gets broad. Is he making fun of her? She can't tell, but it doesn't seem aimed, exactly. Maybe he's like Aoshi-sama, who just likes to give thorough answers.

"I was more talking about the dead thing." Misao pauses. "Are you sure a place full of dead people can be good?" But maybe it can. Maybe some of the dead people she loves will be here.