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pumpkinhollow ([personal profile] pumpkinhollow) wrote in [community profile] ph_memes2024-01-10 06:19 pm
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TDM #4 - Aurora Borealis Blitz [FIRST EDITION]

Pumpkin Hollow Gazette January Issue

[Find our plain text version here!]

Pumpkin Hollow Gazette

1/10/24 | TDM #4 - AURORA BOREALIS BLITZ"
Content Warnings: "Further Details" section has independent CW labels.
Forecast: Heavy snow

BREAKING! REBUILDING HELP REQUESTED

By Cecil Gershwin Palmer

The image?

A photo taken of the damage.

ACROSS PUMPKIN HOLLOW - City government is requesting aid with repairs to public buildings and local fixtures after the recent earthquakes on Tuesday, January 8th. While there was minimal damage to Town Hall itself, several important buildings sustained damage, including the Magpie National Bank, the South Train Station and the Clock Tower, which is now stuck with hands at 8pm.

Regarding the cause of the earthquake, local biologist Dr. Elias Coldwood was heard to say “There's never been seismic activity here.” And he’s a scientist, so he would know! But clearly this is no longer the case. Perhaps Pumpkin Hollow has a mysterious tiny civilization underground worshiping a destroyer god, planning to attack through the bowling alley, the moment we create a bowling alley. Perhaps not. More on this story as it unfolds, faithful readers.

In the meantime, volunteers to help with the damage to city buildings are invited to meet with Mayor Hellen Poe for assignments.

ANNUAL AURORA IN NORTHERN SKY

By Yorick Aberdeen

The image?

An artist's rendition of last year's view.

ABOVE MARROW ISLE - Midwinter is upon us! That means it’s the time of year when our skies light up with the technicolor gleam of the arctic north! Those looking northward between the hours of 10pm and 2am should be able to see beautiful curtains of bright green, blue, purple, and pink lighting up the sky above the island. If you plan to go outside to view the lights rather than looking from your window, please make sure you travel in a group and carry a lantern. May it be ever lit!

HOROSCOPES

By Cecil Gershwin Palmer

The image?

What do the stars say about you today?

Capricorn: Do you feel as if you’ve lost something? If not, it’s wise to double-check. Perhaps it’s not something like a button or a key, but your sense of wonder or your self-confidence. Remember, things tend to be in the last place you look.

Aquarius: Something about the year ending made you feel lighter, like taking off a heavy wool coat. Ride this burst of energy as far as it will take you, because the shiny of a fresh beginning tends to wear off quickly.

Pisces: Don’t worry, I don’t believe what everyone says behind your back. You’re not too sensitive or too naive. They’re just jealous. Really, most of the time when they’re whispering, it’s not even about you.

Aries: You’re the sort of warm individual that babies and animals are drawn to. Unfortunately, this may include hungry wolves and swarms of insects. But don’t let that bring you down! We need that sort of personality around here.

Taurus: There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be the best, until you work to stop others from also being the best. That’s called cheating and may lead to you being disqualified from competitions. If you get caught, that is.

Gemini: You know those riddles about the two guards, one who always tells the truth and one who always lies? Well, everyone hates those riddles with a passion. You’ll see for yourself, soon.

Cancer: Wouldn’t you like to know?

Leo: Your incandescent personality often makes you the center of attention. However, that’s not the only thing about you that glows. Moths may flock to you in the dark this week, and so might children afraid to sleep with the lights out.

Virgo: Be careful with your words–they aren’t just the precursors to your deeds, but the manifestation of your will. This is not a week for idioms and metaphors, not for you. Even something like bemoaning a lack of spoons may make eating cereal harder.

Libra: You are, inevitably, the first one heard to say a situation isn’t fair. And it’s not, nor will it ever be. Instead of getting upset, have you ever considered getting revenge? That’s usually more satisfying in the long run.

Scorpio: Ugh, Scorpios. The position of Venus means your usually volatile emotions will be in the doldrums instead. Enjoy this while it lasts I guess. Who knows if you’ll ever experience such peace again, given, well. You’re kind of an emotional mess and no one likes you.

Sagittarius: There will never be another day like today. You must strive to make the day everything you want it to be. No mistakes, now! Consider your choices very carefully. Consider your choice to consider, very carefully.

SUNFIRE'S HEARTH

By Yorick Aberdeen

The image?

A photo of Mayor Poe's cats, Toffee and Butter, enjoying the view.

ASSORTED LOCATIONS - As the coldest part of the year settles over our fair isle, it is time for Sunfire’s Hearth--- an informal celebration of bonfires and hearth flames, for those unfamiliar! For the months of January and February, a raised platform for bonfires will be lit on weekends, and restaurants and taverns across town will keep their fireplaces lit. Unlike many of our other festivities, there is no structured celebration--- simply make some time during this time to bask in the warmth of a fire! You can even celebrate at home.

An additional benefit of this time of year is that Merrymeet is well on its way. So take this time and get snuggly in front of a fire with your special person to get in the mood for romance! (Or they could be platonic snuggles. Whatever suits you best.)

LOCAL ALCHEMIST REPORTS MISSING POTION

By Yorick Aberdeen

The image?

Some of Mx. Sallek's usual stock. Could stand to have better labels./p>

LOCATION UNCERTAIN - Early Monday morning, local alchemist Aeryn Sallek reported that a large container of magical potion has been swapped with another, and it would seem that the mistaken jug has been sent out for delivery. According to Mx. Sallek, they sent a number of jugs out for delivery in a case with our local delivery extraordinaire, Sam Porter Bridges. The jugs were meant to contain a harmless, potable freeze-resistance potion for our town’s various water sources, in the interest of keeping water reserves drinkable in sub-freezing winter weather. However, when they returned to the shop, one of these potions remained on their counter while a love potion they’d been working on went missing.

“‘Love potion’ is kind of a misnomer, honestly,” Mx. Sallek is quoted to have said on the matter. “But ‘emotional acuity’ potion doesn’t quite roll off the tongue. Basically what it actually does is enhance existing romantic desire and embolden the user to be emotionally open. But Yorick should already know all this, since he’s the one who ordered it.” [Editing note: don’t forget to cut the last part of that comment before publishing. Cecil, you don’t need to include personal statements directed at reporters from these interviews!]

It’s unclear which area of town this particular potion ended up being injected into the water source, but according to Mx. Sallek, the potion was not particularly intense to begin with. It should be significantly diluted as to be harmless. Still, if you notice any strange symptoms such as butterflies in your stomach, a desire to burst into song, or inexplicable yearning, please file a report with the Safety Board at your earliest convenience.

FOOD SHORTAGES PUT STRAIN ON ISLAND ECONOMY

By Yorick Aberdeen

MARKET DISTRICT - While there are many things to celebrate this time of year, Marrow Isle is not without its adversity. Over these past months, many new members of our community have arrived by ferry after our numbers remained small and stagnant for many years. And the presence of our newfound neighbors has been a boon to all of us. Many artisans have opened useful businesses, medical professionals have expanded our access to healthcare, and a new fishing vessel has taken to the seas. However, despite a few additions, our farming community remains quite modest and planting was not planned with such incredible new growth in mind.

The unfortunate result of this is that food reserves on the island this year are uncharacteristically low. As such, Town Council has made the difficult decision to allow for the temporary inflation of food prices and the rationing of food staples.

“We understand the hardship this will place on the residents of Pumpkin Hollow,” said Mayor Poe in a statement after this decision was made. “But please know that we are all in this together. We hope to be able to offer a better incentive package for those interested in farming in the coming springtime.”

Page 1

Further Details...
Aurora

The dead of winter sheds all colors of the trees and flowers across Marrow Isle, but tonight, there are no stark whites and grays and browns.

Tonight, in the sky sprawling with stars above the dreary town, there are lights.

Sprawling trails of violet and green twist and wave through the sky, brightening the earth below and the sea beyond Jack's Marina in magical colors. The return of the borealis is something many Pumpkin Hollowites look forward to, and their reactions are very clear: people scurry down to the shores to watch with wide eyes, many retrieve telescopes, and some even borrow the decks of ships, abandoned for the night at the docks, to watch the sights.

It doesn't take long for this to change, however; the sea nor land are safe from the curse, and it's made quickly apparent that the sky is no exception.

At first, the sight seems like none more than an illusion, perhaps someone blinking and missing a strange shift of the lights. A glimmering outline forms around a cluster of stars, only slightly harder than any of the lines that define the aurora's rays. Several of these shapes form, each array of stars different from the last, some larger, some smaller.

And then, the stars begin to fall.

Seeming to peel off the painted sky, the ebbing colors surrounding the starlight drop, crashing to the world below. Some fall to the streets and beaches, while others fall into the forest, leaving view, or drop into the sea, leaving splashes and waves in their wake that ensure any watching knows full and well that this is not a trick of the light. At first, these shapes are unmoving, glowing masses of aurora-light with stars shining brightly within them. Most townsfolk are uneasy, but this seems to pale in severity to the other disasters, even if they lack any idea of what it could mean for them.

That is, of course, until the masses begin to move.

Each one is as varied as the constellation it stole from the sky: stars form suggestions of skeletal structures, and their "flesh", only consisting of swimming lights and liquid sky that steals any lights around them. Two identical glowing shapes rise to a face finally taking form, and slowly, moving more like gel than animal as it rises to freshly-formed legs, it settles on the closest living thing it can find.

There is no calculation in it, nor what seems to be a glimmer of thought.

It simply lunges with intent to kill.

Horoscopes [CW: Altered emotional states ]

Cecil’s disconcerting horoscopes have the following effects for the next few days:

  • Capricorn: misplaced things, particularly small objects
  • Aquarius: zoomies!
  • Pisces: intense paranoia
  • Aries: Disney princess-like magnetism to local fauna
  • Taurus: insatiable perfectionism
  • Gemini: reversed truth values; lies come out honest, being honest sounds like a lie.
  • Cancer: Pandora-esque curiosity, to the point of personal detriment
  • Leo: radiant glow emanating from your person
  • Virgo: figurative speech is manifested into the world with its literal meaning
  • Libra: a particularly potent desire for revenge
  • Scorpio: numbing of emotions (can be counteracted by love potion, partially)
  • Sagittarius: incapacitating indecision
(Don’t know your character’s sign? Feel free to just decide on one!)

Love Potion [CW: Altered Emotional States ]

Unbeknownst to the townsfolk, the “love” potion ended up in the water supply of the Oak & Iron. As promised by Aeryn, it is thoroughly diluted, as its recipients believed it to be a normal freeze-resistance potion to be mixed with their water.

The effects are not particularly intense. However, anyone who drinks any of the tavern’s housemade ale or cider, drinks the coffee, or eats any food that might require water to cook will experience symptoms of “emotional acuity”. This involves feeling more emotionally open, more receptive to positive feelings about others, a strong desire for physical or verbal affection, and the intensification of romantic or sexual attraction that you might already be experiencing. It will last about half a day. Just in time to help potentially land you a date for Merrymeet, a flower and fertility festival in early spring!

Famine [CW: Starvation and food scarcity ]

Food rationing and inflation will have the following impact:

Grocery budgets for apped-in characters will be reduced in their efficacy. Basic groceries will be only the most minimal of staples. You will likely go hungry if you do not find a way to supplement this. Bountiful groceries will be reduced to the amount of food normally contained in basic. Lavish groceries will not be available at all. Your grocery choices from Activity Check are not able to be modified for this month unless otherwise stated.

Bonuses and Discounts associated with the Farmer and Fisherman jobs are also reduced. Level 1 bonuses will be reduced to standard, which is to say how they would function for a non-Farmer/Fisherman character during a normal, pre-famine month. (ex. Whereas normally a Level 1 Farmer would get free Basic groceries, they will now have to pay the 50 Brass, but do not have the efficacy of Basic groceries reduced as described above.) Level 2 bonuses will be reduced to that of a Level 1 Farmer/Fisherman. (ex. Whereas a Level 2 Fisherman would normally be able to have Bountiful groceries discounted to 50 Brass, they now must pay full price for Bountiful groceries. However, they can still get Basic groceries for free and don’t suffer from the famine induced efficacy reduction for either budget.)

Oak & Iron Residents will only be able to receive bland, repetitive meals with their food vouchers consisting of simple broth, plain bread, bland potato dishes, and the like. It is enough to be fed and comfortable but it is incredibly unsatisfying. (This includes all new characters that are not apped-in.) Drinks, however, are still plentiful.

Characters who do not eat will find that their respective sources of fuel will be reduced to just barely enough to keep them functional, provided that they ration carefully. (Ex. Transformers may want to be less active. Vampires will find that victims cannot handle excessive blood loss without fainting and generally prefer to stay home.)

Characters who were present to fight the Mother Crab back in late summer and chose to can some of their crab can use it now!

Hunting, foraging, and fishing can help reduce the impact of these reductions, and people can share their food. You can absolutely die of starvation. After Merrymeet in February, food will return to normal.

lovinglefthand: (studying)

[personal profile] lovinglefthand 2024-01-30 07:30 pm (UTC)(link)
First Aid nods, studying the map. "I'll try to help as much as I can. I'm more used to plotting evacuation routes than strategic emplacements, but at the very least I can tell you when a space is too cramped for me to effectively maneuver." With a by now normalized pang, he wishes Hotspot and Blades were here. Planning battles was their area of expertise.

"As for the second thing, I'm a little concerned that holding daytime training sessions will exhaust the defenders before nightfall. Surely it's better for them to rest while they can?"
restingslasherface: (pic#16839944)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-01-30 07:50 pm (UTC)(link)
"Hahahaha, ha, hahahaha, HAHAHAHAHAHA you're correct but I wasn't thinking in terms of intensive combat training. This is...going to be a bit of a rude question, actually! You have my apologies! In advance!"

Analog whaps Jean on the chin to make them stop cackling, leaving little pinpricks of blood. Jean rubs his belly with a fingertip in response.

"I uh. Was actually hoping! To make use of your relatively similar size and weight to help the militia with. The logic. Of fighting larger opponents. I am very sorry for this request that has nothing to do with your skills or achievements, but! You are! The biggest person here!"
lovinglefthand: (hands on head)

[personal profile] lovinglefthand 2024-01-30 08:12 pm (UTC)(link)
First Aid clicks his vocalizer and starts to get up, intended to fetch some water and sterile towels so he can clean those claw pricks -- cat's claws are dirty -- but he pauses as Jean explains.

Oh, lovely. He gets to do Ironhide's job.

"Hold that thought," he sighs. "I want to clean your face before the blood clots."

He returns after only a few minutes, sitting down next to Jean in a grumpy silence. "I see no reason to refuse your request," he finally sighs. "It will be a useful experience for the militia. It's just annoying that you can't give them the same level of experience from hitting practice dummies or something. Just because I'm made of metal doesn't mean it doesn't hurt to get hit, after all."
restingslasherface: (pic#16454871)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-01-30 08:23 pm (UTC)(link)
"I'm intending on drawing up a program with minimal actual damage to yourself, but I do understand, and appreciate your cooperation." Gently, Jean removes the paw from their face and, obeying the No Belly boundary, instead gently strokes Analog's head. "Though this may have, haha, other long-term preventative benefits as well."
lovinglefthand: (reckless first aid)

[personal profile] lovinglefthand 2024-01-30 09:02 pm (UTC)(link)
"Well, hopefully super-sized enemies won't be so large as all that," First Aid chuckles quietly as he cleans and disinfects Jean's chin. Luckily it doesn't look like they need any bandages, as long as they avoid doing anything to get smacked again. "But knowledge is power, after all. If the locals are less afraid of large enemies, maybe that'll carry over to monsters more their size as well."
restingslasherface: (pic#16839944)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-01-30 09:28 pm (UTC)(link)
"Exactly! And I do have some concerns...Parade Day got bad, and if more people your size appear it could be devastating. You alone I could handle myself! No offense intended! I'm just very good at killing people! But two, even three more..."
lovinglefthand: (nice guy first aid)

[personal profile] lovinglefthand 2024-02-01 07:32 pm (UTC)(link)
"...Oh." Um, yeah. First Aid has heard about Parade Day, how some people apparently lost control of their senses and started attacking others...

He's just going to coax Analog back into his arms now, and spend a few minutes petting the kitty.

"If I ever realized that I was losing control like that," he says quietly, "I would definitely trip the breakers on the circuit paths leading into my helm, denying power to my processors. I'd shut down within seconds. But if it happened too quickly to react, or if my moral code was compromised...are you sure you'd know what to do in that situation?" he asks Jean. "Where would you attack first?"

restingslasherface: (pic#16454871)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-01 10:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Jean's answer is not excited, not loud, and not happy, but it is decisive: "Destroy the inside of your knees mid-stride, disconnect the legs. Take your shoulders out from the back, quickly. Bring in an exorcist; failing a cure, an engineer, to reduce the odds that I cause a critical overload. Minimal collateral."
lovinglefthand: (remember him)

[personal profile] lovinglefthand 2024-02-01 10:12 pm (UTC)(link)
First Aid nods slowly. It'd be quick and professional; with his limbs disabled, he wouldn't be able to transform or hurt anyone. He does issue a small correction, though: "I don't have a reactor, Jean," he says gently. "My fuel could potentially combust, if a line or my tank ruptured and there was an open flame nearby, but I won't explode. And cutting or crimping off the lines in my neck would be the fastest way to trigger processor shutdown, if that was necessary. My spark is behind too much armor to be easily accessible." He taps the center of his chest.
restingslasherface: (pic#16839944)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-02 12:25 am (UTC)(link)
"Noted! I will say in defense of my manners that I'm used to the high-yield power sources of the City...everything explodes there. Everything." Jean leans in as if to share a secret, and in a way they are because First Aid is about to join Zelda in learning that sometimes Jean has jokes: "Kicked a man wearing light-up shoes once, there was fabric everywhere for three blocks."
lovinglefthand: (in shadow)

[personal profile] lovinglefthand 2024-02-03 02:22 pm (UTC)(link)
"Heh..." He laughs quietly more in appreciation of the attempt than the actual joke. He doesn't want Jean to feel discouraged.

"...If more Cybertronians do show up," he says quietly, "the knees, shoulders, and neck will be weak spots for nearly every individual. Optical lenses too; my helm is reinforced behind the visor, but that's an unusual build. The mouth can also be used to gain access to the processor, among people who have one." He shivers slightly. "If you catch someone in vehicle mode, sabotaging their engine block or axles will usually prevent them from transforming, with the latter also immobilizing them to some degree. People who don't have vehicular alt-modes will be less vulnerable in that department, but so many of us transform into cars or trucks that it's good to keep in mind."

He shakes his head slightly. "Nearly any Autobot would prefer being disabled to being forced to harm innocent organics. And if any Decepticons turn up -- I don't see why they would, surely Lady Mortanne wouldn't even bother to ask -- but if they did, it would be necessary to defend the town from them. They would be a threat to everybody."
restingslasherface: (pic#16839944)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-03 05:14 pm (UTC)(link)
"...Doctor," Jean murmurs quietly. "I am going to formally disbelieve that last statement, on two grounds. First, the demonstrable competence of the White-haired Manager's hiring practices. Second..."

"I don't think you've thought through what designating an entity hostile to me entails, Doctor. These... Decepticons, would be of the ferry like us. Unable to die wholly. If I had to treat them with unrelenting hostility that would mean imprisonment, under harsh conditions. You surely didn't just suggest that."
lovinglefthand: (Default)

[personal profile] lovinglefthand 2024-02-04 12:02 am (UTC)(link)
Tired of being pet, Analog wiggles out of First Aid's lap and begins playfully attacking the map Jean drew. First Aid gently takes it away from him and fetches a small stuff animal, vaguely mouse-shaped with a long leather tail, down from one of the shelves. Jean may recognize it as having been sewn together with sutures.

Once Analog is occupied with the toy, First Aid turns back to Jean and says, evenly, "I understand why you might feel that way. I've avoided talking about my people's war because it's not relevant to our assignment here and because, frankly, it's a part of my life I'd give a great deal to forget. It gives me no sense of pride to admit that one half of my species has been at war with the other for the past ten million years. But you have to understand, Jean, that I'm not speaking from a place of hyperbole when I say that the Decepticons ruined our home planet, and have spent the past twenty-three years -- longer than I myself have been alive -- trying to do the same to Earth. It's the fault of us Autobots that our war reached Earth in the first place, and we have done our best to take responsibility for that and minimize the damage to Earth's biosphere and its people. But if Megatron had had his way, every human on Earth would be either dead or enslaved to the Decepticon war machine. Their culture incentivizes violence, greed, and xenophobia, and if even one of their number arrived on Marrow Island I truly believe it would be a disaster for the native inhabitants on par with a demonic incursion. Do you understand me better now?"
Edited 2024-02-04 00:04 (UTC)
restingslasherface: (pic#16839944)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-04 12:06 am (UTC)(link)
"...I do understand you better, Doctor, but I need you to understand this: you just described my culture."

It is not something Jean says proudly. Not even defensively, not quite. But quietly, and with a sort of conviction. They changed, here, in this short time.

Why not another?
lovinglefthand: (nice guy first aid)

[personal profile] lovinglefthand 2024-02-04 12:27 am (UTC)(link)
First Aid nods slightly, conceding Jean's point -- but not entirely.

"And how old are you, Jean? Thirty years old? Forty? Megatron, Starscream, Shockwave...all of them have had millions of years to reconsider and end the war. Starscream himself used to be an explorer and scientist, but he chose to be a warrior instead, and now he's so bloodthirsty that not even his own side can trust him. And it's not as though we never tried to make peace with them -- Optimus Prime tried many, many times, both on Cybertron and on Earth, and each time Megatron broke his word and attacked us again. It would be lovely to think that Mortanne could give them a reason to change, but...given their history, I think it's far more likely they would simply lie to her for the chance at enslaving this island and taking its resources for themselves. And I pray that never happens, but if it does...I wanted you to be forewarned, Jean. Since you chose to take up this burden."
restingslasherface: (pic#16454871)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-04 12:58 am (UTC)(link)
"It's not the role of the hiring manager to give them a reason to change. It's ours." Jean sighs, and lowers their head, staring at their hands on their lap. "...Doctor, I understand your concerns. I even echo them. If someone else from the City came here, someone not from the Library...the damage they could deal is incalculable. I shudder to imagine the slaughter and ruin that a figure such as the Purple Tear or a Claw could do if properly motivated. It keeps me up at night. It wakes me from a dead sleep. I accept, openly, that a show of force may be necessary if one of these Decepticons is hired, but can you say you understand the incentives on them? The history that motivates them, the ideology that justifies them? To be here is to have one's context completely changed, to be broken, clean, from every factor that has ever pressed in on you in your old life. To be alone with your past, without its hammer pressing down on your present."

"It just feels like you have compassion for people, but not any faith in them."
lovinglefthand: (remember him)

[personal profile] lovinglefthand 2024-02-04 01:10 am (UTC)(link)
"I --" First Aid shuts up for a moment, tilting his head in thought. His face is as blank as always as he sits for a moment with what Jean just said, the words echoing in his sensors. Finally he asks, in a small, hurt voice, "Is that really what I sound like?"
restingslasherface: (pic#16454871)

[personal profile] restingslasherface 2024-02-04 01:14 am (UTC)(link)
"It's what I hear," Jean answers softly. "That's not the same thing. I can barely grasp the, the...haha, the damage, done to me, Doctor. Maybe I'm the only one hearing you that way. Am I?"