"I spent nearly a third of my life having to make similar calculations myself." Still low-voiced, and now very level. "And when it was over -- when I first had reason to hope it might be over -- I could not at first contemplate taking on a role of authority, for fear of what I might do with it. Because of what I knew I had done, and what I had allowed to pass unchallenged. To keep myself safe."

A pause.

"I wonder if anything similar has crossed your own mind, in pursuing such a role."